PB-185 Negotiating … Behind the Scenes - Property Inc

[ Podcast Transcription ]

I’m Peter Bonamignis and he is Chris Lane and welcome to another of these regular property briefings.

And a warm welcome to you, Chris. Well, as always, it’s good to be here with you. From what you’ve covered in earlier podcasts, There is clearly more to a negotiation than merely a series of compromises. Could you perhaps provide our listeners with some helpful insights of what really goes on behind the scenes?

Well, you’re absolutely right, because most people negotiate using a zero sum approach. In other words, depending on whether you’re buying or selling, they determine what they want out of the deal and then raise or lower That figure by 10%, maybe 15, and then engage in a series of compromises. to obtain that result.

Now their focus is on the position they take and are looking to claim as much of that position for themselves as possible and therefore their mission is not to get a satisfactory deal for both parties, it’s simply to win. Now most investors will refer to that as being a tough negotiator, however you’ll find it can be extremely stressful.

And your natural tendency is to negotiate from the viewpoint of positions, and most people never really stop to ask what the other side wants, or even consider why they’re actually negotiating. So what is your main aim as a negotiator? Well, the purpose of negotiating is to see if your interests can be achieved through an agreement where your…

Interest is why you want something, not what it is that you want. You see, when two parties start negotiating from a standpoint of shared interests, they begin exploring alternative solutions. Now initially, you may find this a little uncomfortable informing the other side of what it is you want, mainly because you feel that you are showing them your cards.

However, negotiating doesn’t have to be something you argue over or who gets the most. And at its best, negotiating involves two parties working to resolve a common problem. In other words, why each party wants something. is where the problem solving process truly begins. And of all the skills involved, what do you feel is the most important?

It’s probably that you learn the interests of the other party through listening. And yet you’ll find that most people are not good listeners. In fact, most listen only to reply, rather than to understand. Various studies have shown that communication is made up of words for 7%, Your tone of voice for 38 percent and body language, the rest of 55%.

So from these figures you quickly realize that 93 percent is non verbal and therefore it’s no wonder that so much gets lost between the speaker’s lips and your ears, because non verbal communication is the most important thing in determining a speaker’s style. So your first step is to use Questioning to uncover the interests of the other party.

And in order to be effective at asking questions, three things must take place. Firstly, you need to have a clear direction for your questions because people find randomly asked questions can be rather unnerving and it makes them distrust you. Secondly, you ask the other party if it’s okay with them that you ask them questions and then you tell them what information it is that you want to know.

There must be more to it than that. Well, use the three levels of listening to obtain information. And that is, you be selective. And this is where you focus on things you believe that are relevant. Next, you are responsive. And this is to allow the other party to know that you are indeed paying attention.

It involves verbal and physical feedback, nodding, or simply asking, tell me more about that. And then the third aspect or level of listening is the playback, and that’s restating what you think you heard and asking for confirmation. And it’s also beneficial to follow up with a confirming question. Now as you work through the issues in the negotiation, playback can also be used as a mini close.

In other words, making it more difficult for an issue to resurface later. You can say, when we talked earlier, we agreed on this. What did I miss? So it enables you to tie down the other party. So it comes down to asking the right questions, then attentively listening. Yeah, that’s correct. You see, effective questioning and listening skills can provide solutions to most negotiating problems.

Thank And by getting the other party to talk and listening to their replies, you’re sending a positive message, and it greatly enhances the trust and helps keep the tension low. You see, when people do business, they do it with you because you are perceived as trustworthy, a good problem solver, and someone who adds value.

to the relationship during the negotiation. I’m guessing that planning is rather important. Yes, and what I’m talking about here is rather detailed planning, which involves attempting to determine what the other side may or may not want. And also why, and your plan should include things like trying to establish the negotiating style of the other party.

And this helps you think through how best to communicate and then go through the process of confirming if you were right. And if you don’t know the other party at all, You’ll have to make an educated guess and adjust your thinking as you go along. You also then want to fully establish what your real interests are.

This is not what you want, but why it is that you want them, and also what are their interests. And furthermore, you have to ask what do you have that you can trade that’s of lesser value to you and of higher value to them during the negotiation. In the give and take phase of the process, having considered these options ahead of time, you can make this far less stressful rather than having to go through a series of positional compromises.

In other words, it becomes a reflex response. to something they seek or what you’re seeking from them. Now, during a negotiation, you want to try and introduce negotiations of compromise and problem solving. And you might float something like, what if we tried such and such? Or how about we do this? And it tends to Fly a kite and invite them to come up with a creative solution to the problem.

Do you have any final thoughts? Well, it’s probably vital that you establish what we’ll call your irreducible position because You don’t want to end up agreeing to anything beyond that. And this, obviously, if you’re buying, is the highest figure you’ll go to, if you’re selling, the lowest figure. And with practice, you learn how to say no, and to also walk away leaving the relationship intact.

Thank you for giving us those insights. Look, it’s important to understand that people are not born negotiators. Rather, it’s a learned skill which everyone can master. Well, I think that probably is the most encouraging thing artists can perhaps take from today. So, many thanks. Well, you know, it’s always a pleasure.